One of those days (warning, slightly inappropriate. i.e. don't let Miss Thing read!)

Yesterday was the last day of our big sale and I knew it was going to be a long day so I had prepared myself for a few things to go wrong from being so tired (I had worked 12 hour days for the past 3 days) but it was just a comedy of errors.  I arrived at the store I was covering (we often help each other out during these extra busy weeks), got everything prepared for the day then went to use the restroom before opening the doors to what I hoped was going to be a flood of customers...and realized I was wearing black underwear with very thin khaki shorts.  Oops!  No big deal, I can roll with it.  I'll just wear my shirt untucked.  The shorts had big pockets, so I figured between my shirt covering my hips and my pockets covering most of my rear end, hopefully no one would be staring at my crotch long enough to notice my black undies.  Problem solved, right?  Wrong.  Because as I was checking my rear to make sure I was mostly covered I saw a big dark spot on the leg of my shorts.  I had eaten granola in the car on my way to work and apparently had smashed some dried fruit into my shorts.  Awesome.  Now I not only look like a slob with my shirt untucked, but a dirty slob, at that!  Okay, Karen, roll with it.  Clean your shorts the best you can and move on with your day.  Done and done.  Things were going pretty smoothly until a bit later when I couldn't figure out why my belly kept itching.  Finally, when I didn't have any customers, I reached inside my shirt, thinking maybe the weird fabric of my work shirt was keeping me from getting a good scratch...only to find granola stuck to my stomach.  Oh, the joys of eating breakfast in the car, but I just couldn't bring myself to get up early enough to eat breakfast at home.  So, on with my day.  Things calmed down again until I arrived at our main store to help out with the end of the sale and my shorts just seemed to be a magnet for dirt.  I picked up a box to carry it out to a customer's car and something started leaking all over me.  Between the dark spot on my leg and the wet spot... *ahem* I looked like I needed to find a restroom.  Quite a bit of dirt and yuck later, I finally got in the car to head home.  While many of my coworkers stopped off for a beer to celebrate the end of the sale, I hit the drive through for a shake, which I promptly spilled on my leg.  Thankfully not the entire thing, but just enough to make a nice little sticky spot.  I didn't want it to melt and run down onto my upholstery so I tried to wet a napkin with my water bottle so I could clean it up...and dumped about half my water in my lap. Sticky spot crisis averted, I drove the rest of the way home feeling as if I'd wet myself.  Oh, I'm so thankful today is a new day and I'm wearing different pants!