Naked blogging: It Works

I've been debating for a long time whether to share this information, because I didn't want to admit that I had doubts about the products I've been using and selling, but I've come to the realization that a LOT of people have doubts about the products I've been selling, and sharing my story can only help.  This is hard to admit and even harder to put into writing, but I truly hope that sharing my doubts and worries can help someone out there to overcome their own.

I've been using It Works! products for a couple of months now.  I start my day with Thermofit (a natural metabolism booster) and Greens (to detoxify, alkalize and balance the body in addition to providing 8 servings of fruits and vegetables), take Fat Fighters (which bond with fat and carbs you consume to flush them out of your system) as needed if I cheat on my healthy eating or eat something to which I am allergic (my allergies aren't bad enough to prevent me from eating the things I like, but I have found that the Fat Fighters help flush the icky stuff out of my system before it gives me too much trouble) and end my day with New You (so many benefits I won't list them all here, but I will say it helps me sleep better!) and It's Vital (a multivitamin).  I felt a lot better, had more energy and less affects from my allergies but just didn't really feel like I was getting anywhere weight or inches loss wise, and I have to admit, I was getting pretty discouraged.  My wedding dress was tight and uncomfortable, my clothes weren't fitting any better and I didn't feel like I looked any better.  In the weeks leading up to the wedding, I had just about given up.  Between the I'm-too-busy-to-make-dinner-so-let's-just-go-out-to-eat and the I'm-too-stressed-out-to-curb-my-emotional-eating I just knew I was gaining weight.  Thankfully, my dress had a corset back, so I knew if I packed on a couple pounds I would be more uncomfortable, but still able to wear the dress.  I wrapped four times (a complete treatment) in the week and a half leading up to the wedding and still didn't feel like I was seeing any results but I just couldn't worry about it at that point.  Miss Thing, overhearing BBS and I talking about my frustration and anxiety over how the dress would fit, told me she thought I looked like I'd lost weight, but I just wasn't seeing it.  I felt awful about myself.  And then the big day arrived.  I don't think anyone else knew, but I was on pins and needles all day long.  Not because I was nervous about marrying Man, but because I was worried my dress wouldn't fit!  I hadn't had it on in about two weeks and I was just sure I was going to end up busting a seam and getting married in my sweats!  As I stepped into my dress, I worried that I wouldn't be able to get it up over my huge hips.  But it easily pulled up.  As I held the dress up I fretted that Mom wouldn't be able to snap the modesty panel in place.  But, despite her having to dig out her reading glasses to see the tiny closure, it clipped easily into place.  Then, as Mom laced the corset back, I agonized over whether she would have enough lacing to close up the whole back.  But there was lacing to spare and the dress fit better than ever.

All my worrying was for nothing.  I should have trusted my body instead of my mirror.  Despite eating junk, not getting enough sleep and running around like a crazy woman, I felt and still do feel) better than I have in years.  Looking at the pictures, I see now that I look better than I have in years.  I think we all have these images of ourselves in our minds, where we will never look as good to ourselves as we do to other people.  When Miss Thing mentioned that she thought I looked like I'd lost weight, we discussed that sometimes other people see the weight loss or body changes before you do because they don't see you every day, but I really think a lot of it has to do with how you look at yourself, too.  When I looked in the mirror I saw the crazy, stressed out nearing-bridezilla woman that I was at the time.  Now, looking at pictures, I'm able to see the happy, healthy, in love woman that I am.  And I am so thankful for my It Works! products that helped me survive that crazy time and will continue to help me become the most healthy version of me I can be!

Naked blogging: That's my gift

Tomorrow is my first of two bridal showers.  I have to admit, I've kind of been dreading them.  It's not that I don't appreciate them, in fact I've thrown lots of showers and not only do I know how much work it is (and really, really appreciate the fact that BBS is helping with both my showers!) but I also know how much fun they can be.  It's just that I'm not one to love the spotlight, despite my singing, dancing and acting background.  I was always part of the group on stage, not one to stand out.  These two days are going to be all about me.  I'll be in the hot seat, and even more than that, everyone is showing up to give me presents.  I just got off the phone with an old friend who was heading to shop for our shower gift.  She wanted to know if there was something special on our registry that I was super excited to receive.  I didn't register for stuff I don't want.  In fact, it was really hard to make a list of all the stuff I wanted instead of just buying it.  After all, it's for me, why shouldn't I buy it for myself?  How weird is it that I got so incredibly lucky as to find the love of my life and we get to share that with all our loved ones and have this huge celebration, and they all have to give us something?  If anything, we should be giving gifts to our family and friends for helping us along this journey that led us to each other.  As the dates approach, I find myself becoming excited about my showers, but it's not because I'll get to sit around and open presents; it's because I'll have the opportunity to gush about Man all day long without anyone telling me how silly-in-love I am!  I found this amazing man, I fell madly in love and I get to share it with the world.  That's my gift.

Naked blogging: I choose to be engaged today

I don't wear my engagement ring all the time.  I know so many people who do, but somehow I'm always afraid something will happen to it when I'm cleaning, doing dishes and rough housing with the kids or the dogs.  I take it off as soon as I get home and don't put it back on until I'm ready to leave the next morning.  The other day, as I ran back into the bathroom to grab it out of my little jewelry dish I said, "I choose to be engaged today."  Man was brushing his teeth at the time and gave me a look as if I'd hurt his feelings.  I didn't understand why it upset him but Man explained that he took that as me having the option to not be engaged. To me, it's the process of making a conscious decision each day to put my all into our relationship and now that I've explained that, he actually likes that I say my little daily mantra.  I truly believe you have to remind yourself daily why you love your significant other.  Some days it's easy; other days you really struggle to remember.   I read an article today about "happily-ever-after" versus "reality-ever-after" that said it so much better than I could ever hope to:

"Being married isn’t one decision. Being married is deciding to stay married every single day. It’s hard. It’s boring. It’s not terribly cinematic."

It's hard to admit that it's not all roses and puppy dogs, especially when we're not even married yet.  No one likes to expose their flaws.  But it's important to talk about those things and to remember, we're not alone on those down days.  Everyone goes through it, and it's the healthy, successful relationships that come out the other side.  I hope I can remember this and continue my mantra now and forever.  I am so lucky to have found the Man of my dreams, and today and forever, I choose to be with him.

Happy Father's Day

The girls and I woke up early (or earlier than Man, anyway!) and made blackberry, raspberry and blueberry crisp, as well as bacon and eggs.  Man woke up just as things were wrapping up and we had an awesome breakfast together as a family before I had to leave for work.  There's absolutely nothing like spoiling your man with homemade breakfast and spoiling the kids with dessert for breakfast!  Bonus: the girls thought they were getting some awesome treat, when really it was a sneaky way to get some different fruits into them!  On the way to work, I stopped by my parents' house and surprised my dad with a second berry crisp.  I'm so lucky to have such amazing fathers in my life!  Thank you both, and Happy Father's Day!

I would be remiss not to mention that there are undoubtedly some guys out there who would love to be celebrating Father's Day with their little someone specials but are unable.  Whatever the reason you are childless or without your child, know that you are not alone.  Happy Father's Day, Happy Not-a-Father's Day, or just happy day.  I celebrate with you, I grieve with you and, perhaps most importantly, I understand.

Naked blogging: It Works! edition

My weight has always been a struggle for me.  Growing up with a sister who was a stick because she took after our mom's side of the family while I was "curvy" (which is just a nice way of saying I've always been a big girl) because I took after our dad's side of the family was always tough, but I really need to stop using that as an excuse to be overweight.  Now is the time and It Works! is the tool.  Check out the rest of the story on my It Works! website.

Naked blogging, first edition

I recently learned about naked blogging.  We all use our blogs as a sort of online, public journal, but so rarely do we really speak from the heart.  Most of my blog is about silly things the kids or the dogs did or funny quips between Man and I.  I use my blog to express myself, inform others about things I find important and hopefully entertain along the way.  Now I would like to also use my blog to help others see that just because you may seem "normal" (okay, we all know I'm not normal, but I can put on the "normal" hat from time to time!) on the outside doesn't mean you don't have a lot going on on the inside.  I hope to make this a regular thing and invite you to join in.  Whether you write your own blog post and leave a link in comments, just leave a quick comment or email me directly (karenfosters (dot) tumblr (at) gmail (dot) com) I'm really looking forward to opening the dialog, stripping it down and getting naked.

Mother's Day last year was pretty rough.  It was super close to the one year anniversary of The Boy leaving and it seemed like there were reminders everywhere and the days leading up to it were tear-filled.  I even ended up missing out on celebrating Mother's Day with my own mom and BBS because I just couldn't put on a happy face and didn't want to be a mess in front of the monkeys.  This year things are different.  No, I'm not a mother.  I never will be.  But I'm starting to come to terms with that.  I've known for a long time that the odds of me ever having my own children were slim to none but when The Boy called me Mommy my heart melted and I thought maybe I didn't need to give birth to be someone's mommy.  Then reality hit and I realized fostering is even tougher than I'd expected and I knew I needed someone in it with me.  Time passed and I realized that as I got older, the odds of finding someone who wanted to foster and/or adopt grew less and less.  Let's face it, by the time a guy is my age, he either has kids or don't want kids.  I think that's part of the reason why Mother's Day was so hard last year.  I realized the my only chance at being called Mommy had left me nearly a year before. 

So why do I think this year will be easier?  Well, for one thing, we celebrated Mother's Day a day early this year.  I know that doesn't seem much different, but the day of will always be the hardest, and tomorrow I'll be at work, training my new guy and keeping my mind busy with pools and customers instead of lost chances.  But more importantly, I have an incredible man and three beautiful little girls in my life.  And while I will never be their mommy (nor will I ever try to be), I get to be their step mommy, and I'm learning that that just might be enough.